Tinkle Monster

In case you don't know, I work in an office. And in this office, I work with people who are considered professionals in this industry (and by that, I mean people who would probably be labeled upper-middle class - think white collared, business suited individuals). One would expect a basic level of cleanliness and courtesy while at work. Sure, there are people who have messy desks or leave crumbs all over the place... and sure, there are also those who leave their trash in the lunch room once in a while.

BUT recently there has been a TINKLER, who we have dubbed the bathroom bandit, or Ms. T. This dirty mofo has been using the [ladies] restroom and peeing ALL OVER the toilet seat. Now - I don't mean the little bit of "afterflush" that might appear on the seat after the flusher does its job - I mean it looks like some little boy has gone in there and not learned to lift the toilet seat - so he pees all over the place. This has been happening for a few months. Being [slightly!] OCD, this really disgusts me. Not that it wouldn't disgust me if I weren't OCD, but it definitely makes things worse. I decided to take matters into my own hands and posted these signs up on Monday:

Phase 1 in effect.

I didn't take this while sitting on the can, by the way. =D

Note the red used to highlight the toilet seat.

So I told a few coworkers about these signs and now we have formed an "informal" investigative group. Yes, there is an excel spreadsheet, and we have been reporting back to each other whenever we spot any of these... "cases."

So Monday was fine and dandy... could it really be??! Were the signs really working??! I was sadly quite happy about this (which goes to show you how pathetic my work life is, REALLY).

Then Tuesday rolled around. And then the TINKLER struck again!!!!!!!! What the HELL??!!! How does she sit/squat/whatever the hell she does without seeing the sign and then leave her freaking piss all over the damn place? This is really disgusting. I would take pictures, but I'll spare you the images. Also, being caught taking a picture of piss all over a toilet would raise some weird questions I'd rather not answer, haha.

I have a sneaking suspicion now re: who it is. But my team and I will have to do some more investigative work before confronting said person. If this continues onto next week, I may be forced to use a more aggressive tactic.

If you sprinkle
When you tinkle
Be sweet
Wipe the seat!

More updates coming soon.

hahahahaha